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Thursday, October 30, 2008

Photo Disaster

Have you ever had something in mind that you thought would be really lovely... and then watched it all fall apart?

That's what happened this morning.

I was given a gift certificate for a professional photo shoot for my birthday back in August. I'm not very photogenic, but I thought I might end up with a nice pic of me to use on the backs of books, for profiles, etc.

My idea was to get a photo of me with my three dogs:- Mickey on my knee and Tiger and Nigg either side of me, sitting on our back steps. Good idea. Casual and natural.

Did it turn out that way?

No way! Of course it bloody didn't!

Mickey wouldn't stop growling at Tiger, who decided Mickey was breakfast-sized. Dixi the cat planted herself on the top step and growled at the dogs until they went bananas. Tiger and Nigg wouldn't settle or stop barking. They wouldn't listen to me and raced around like lunatics. [My early morning walk to settle them down obviously made no difference.]

I had to put Dixi inside and lock Mickey inside as well. He protested throughout the whole photo shoot - very loudly and incessantly.

By the time I settled the other two maniacs down, I looked all frazzled and rumpled. I'd taken so much time getting my 4' long hair to look nice and wavy, and put nice make-up on. Well... my hair went flat, my make-up ended up in places I didn't think make-up could go, and I'll be lucky if I don't end up looking like a Piccasso.

Just great!

The glimpse I saw on the photographer's camera wasn't too promising. Nice photo of the dogs, but I looked like a fat, rumbled frump with my hair all over the place and a red face with panda eyes.

Now I'm dreading going up there tomorrow to have a look at the finished product. One can only imagine that the poor photographer is going to be in therapy for the next month to clear those images out of his mind.

How am I going to explain to the guy that the only reason I'd buy any of his photos would be so no-one else can get their hands on them and use them as blackmail material?

I've seen some really beautiful portraits of people with their animals. Why couldn't it have worked for me? Just once!

And to make matters worse... while I'm bitching about all this, all I can hear is that annoying little voice inside my head saying: "So, what did you learn from all this?"

This is what I learnt:

Animals definitely never behave when you need them to - even when they are really well trained. Note:- They've been exceptionally well behaved since the photographer left. Grrrrrr!

When you plan something special and there's no room or time for things to go wrong - that's when everything will go wrong.

[Insert sigh here]

What else?

If you start out in life as an "ugly duckling" you'd better develop a good sense of humour! You sure are going to need it. Especially when you have to look at photos of yourself in all your manic glory.

When I looked on his digital camera, instead of seeing the beautiful swan I imagined myself to be, there smiling back at me was a fat old duck perched on a step like a stale bit of crumpet between two manically grinning dogs. Yikes! Do I really look like that?

Ugh!

I really don't know what I'm going to say to this guy tomorrow.

One thing I do know - he'd better destroy all the evidence!

Cheers

Brittany K.



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Casting the Stones

Long before the Tarot became synonymous with fortune telling, Gypsies used the natural world around them to help them see into the troubled hearts of those who came seeking knowledge and guidance.
River stones, gems, crystals, sticks, needles and bones were often used by the dunkerer [dukkerer] or palm reader.
I love using my own set of river stones that I personally hand picked and charged with healing energy.
When I read, I'm not so much telling a fortune, as looking into the heart of the energy surrounding the person I'm reading for. I believe this gives a more accurate insight into what is at the heart of a problem or situation and can provide real, down to earth ways of helping people deal with what life sometimes throws at them.
Casting the stones is something I love and I hope to continue with my readings for as long as life will allow.

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